Darkness, My Teacher: A Journey into Yangti Yoga

Abstract

Spiritual practice is vital to the cultivation of our capacity for spiritual caregiving and embodied spiritual understanding. This paper is an experiential account of a journey into the Buddhist practice of yangti yoga, or dark retreat practice, rooted in the Dzogchen tradition of the Nyingma school of Tibetan Buddhism. It documents my early relationship to death, how this led me to the Buddhist path, and my decision to forgo my law career to attend Harvard Divinity School and pursue a career in hospital chaplaincy. The paper traces my experiences during 100 hours of dark retreat and the surprisingly relational dimensions of yangti yoga. As a process of individual and interpersonal reflection, this paper highlights the critical role of spiritual friendship and integration in spiritual life and practice.